I changed the layout of the site back to the way it was for now.  I definitely want to change things up, maybe go for a radically different approach even, but I don’t have time to really get into it right this minute.

I do this site mostly because over the years people have convinced me that what I say is interesting.  I really need the help of those couple-dozen or so of you who are regular visitors in spreading the word.  I’m not asking you to relentlessly pimp me to everyone you meet at every opportunity, but if you see something that you strongly agree or disagree with, or that makes you laugh or cry or think, please use the little social bookmarking widget in the top right area of every page (it looks like this: ).  It’ll share the content of the page you’re on to just about any kind of social network you can imagine, including bookmarking it in your browser or sending a link via e-mail if you want.  It only takes a second or three, depending on what service you want to use.  I get a lot of positive feedback, increasingly so in ‘real life’ as my online and offline worlds continue to slowly converge, and I guess I don’t get why if people are so willing to let me know personally that they dig my work, they aren’t willing to share it or leave a comment on the site.  If anyone has thoughts on this, please let me know.

On my more confident days, I really believe that whatever the hell it is I’m doing here can get over, given adequate exposure.  More importantly, on my more arrogant days I really believe that I’m saying things that more people need to hear and talk about.  I don’t know if the vast majority of my FB friends have my posts hidden, or if I have a knack for writing things that everyone agrees with but nobody talks about, or what the deal is. If you do, clue me in.

For the record:  I’m quite well aware that I’m not “normal,” and for the most part I like it that way. It’s inconvenient and it’s not lucrative, and I don’t always like who I’ve been…but I like who I am.  Near as I can tell, so do most people I meet.

I met a guy at a bar here in town, he’s a manager.  Talked to him about the stuff I’ve been working on, reviving the local music scene.  He informed me that Kalamazoo has no music scene, Kalamazoo has NEVER had a music scene, he is “way ahead of me”, they’ve got their own nice little one-bar scene that they’re perfectly happy with, and there’s really no need to bother trying to get something going again that was never going in the first place.

I want this guy out of my town.  What an ignorant dick.  This guy is sucking money out of local pockets to underpay local bands (and not even the good ones, far as I can tell) all for the privilege of foisting his bland, mediocre view of the world and his own place in it on the rest of us…and then has the incredible lack of wit to stand there and essentially piss on my life and work, not to mention the lives and work of hundreds if not thousands of other local performers over the modern history of the area.  I shudder to think which “one band” he thinks came from Kalamazoo.  Probably f’n Elvis. And then he goes on to brag about how he lived for 10 years in seattle and lived for 10 years in athens and that’s what a scene looks like and there’s a thousand towns like Kalamazoo and blah blah blah and just generally looking down his nose at the town and people from whom he is making his living.

I can’t tell you how much fun I’m having in my head with twisted fantasies of long-dead bands reuniting and pulling a “spontaneous” reunion at this bar, complete with impromptu live performances and Mike Hard’s bare ass and googly eyes all over the place.  “Eternal Dream” or “Liverbox” or any one of thousands of other tunes ripping this asshole’s face off makes JH a happy boy.

I’m not even going to bother telling people who this guy is, or which bar, for now…I’ve got plans, and I don’t want to artificially change the results just because some sawed-off little moron with a big mouth and a small brain insulted my life.  But I’ll say this much:  First of all, anyone who thinks they’re way ahead of me is just too stupid to know they’re being passed again.  Second, you don’t walk into a town, occupy one of its most hallowed spaces, and then go around looking down your nose at the town and insulting its history, its people, and its heritage.  You sure as hell don’t walk into THIS town and play that shit.

Because you see, mister, if it wasn’t for me and all my friends who were in all the bands that didn’t come from Kalamazoo and who didn’t spend years and untold dollars and who didn’t go to the shows that didn’t happen and a few of us even who didn’t die or destroy ourselves chasing that rockstar carrot back in the days of the scene that never existed, your sorry ass wouldn’t be here.  Christ, you moron, half those kids you’re selling beer to are probably MINE.

As I’ve said before:  I’m going to make this happen.  Get on board, or get out of the way.  But don’t you dare insult my life and the lives of people I’ve loved and then try to make a buck by fabricating a cheap, hollow, soulless imitation of them.

I will crush you.

Enough of that.  Dude’s attitude threw me for a bit of a loop – I’ve been “up” for about three weeks now, so it was about time something did – but not for much of one…and now I’m not just motivated and energized, I’m pissed.  No wonder the music scene is thin around here, if jackasses like this are involved.  Guy makes Chris Altman look like Bill Graham.

I’m way behind on a lot of things I want to get written; I’ve been pulling 70+hour shifts for about two months now, and it’s really wearing me down physically and backing up my work all over the place.  Something’s gonna have to change pretty quick; last weekend was decent, money-wise, and if it stays that way it won’t be so bad.

I need to tell everyone about Sarah one of these days.  A complicated story about a girl I love, I hope it ends well.